


Silent Hill: Twisted Desires (Part 1)

by lefoxdenoir



Series: Silent Hill: Twisted Desire [1]
Category: Silent Hill (Video Game Series)
Genre: Gen, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Past Rape/Non-con, Silent Hill References, Trauma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-24
Updated: 2018-10-24
Packaged: 2019-08-06 18:46:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,899
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16393136
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lefoxdenoir/pseuds/lefoxdenoir
Summary: Richard awakens in Silent Hill. He is a walking shadow haunted by his past. A mysterious girl from his past haunts him as does his mother. What has Richard come to Silent Hill to face? Is there redemption for him? Can he be saved?





	Silent Hill: Twisted Desires (Part 1)

And in her footsteps, Hell followed. She opened a gate to something nocturnal, dormant and alive. And as the winds howled, picking up speed, everything turned to rust and ash. Blood became her skin and her skin was a disease, contained by a bitter smoke, a fuel of hatred.

Her hair was a raven flame. As the fires rose behind her and from her hate, she birthed creatures of pain, creatures of punishment. They did not walk on 2 legs or see with mortal eyes, they only looked on in undeniable pain, twisted and contorted in their features; they only bred anger, they only bred pure hatred

“Now you will feel my pain, now you will feel my rage.” Elizabeth said.

As the summit of darkness plunged into the depths below, she maintained a phantasmagoric nature, quiet and vengeful. She stared him in the eyes now, and Richard trembled. His black hair blew in his face but could not cover up her face-a face of hatred, a face of anger and pain.

“All dark things are born from hate.” she uttered, speaking to the wind.

Still she hovered over nothingness and he stood there, frozen between fear and pain. A noise wailed in his head and it wouldn’t stop. It got louder, closer…and then there was nothing.

–

Falling ash swirled to the ground like makeshift snowflakes. It fell and breathed life into a dying man. Richard opened his eyes to a street. There were garbage cans along the pathway of the alley before him and silence. There was nothing but silence. Even the ashes didn’t make a sound.   
–

“Mom. Momma.” he cried behind a plexiglass window. A woman with years of grief on her face got up and walked away. She left Richard to grieve. As he sobbed, she turned around, her gray her falling down her back and then she said one thing before she left.

“ You disgust me.”

He remembered the pain that throbbed inside of him, starting in the center of his chest. It radiated from some chasm within him and his hatred formed into something nearly palpable. 

“We all have to pay for our sins. You are not my son, you are not my child. You are the Devil, you are a lie.” she had said only moments before, just before he whimpered her name like a lost child, in search of something, anything that made sense.

–

It haunted him everyday and every night as it whispered in his ear. It was the reason he cut himself and the reason for the scars. It was the reason he felt like the whole world stared at him as if they could see, as if they knew what he’d done, that he was a bad person, that he had sins, as dark as night, as eternal as hatred.

She was a 14 year old girl walking home from high-school. And he waited for her. He covered her mouth and put her in his car. He heard her trying to scream in the backseat and all the pleas she’d made. It wasn’t his fault, it wasn’t her fault, it wasn’t anyone’s fault.

“Be a good boy. You always make mommy so proud. Mommy loves you”

Mother is God. That’s what he used to believe before she turned on him and took away the only bond he could have ever trusted.

His father had walked out on her years before and his final words were, “You’re sick Lia. You’re really fucking sick. Get help.” and then he left. Richard held on to that hatred his whole life. He blamed his father for leaving him with a demon, with a woman he barely knew but should have known so well. They are whispers in our mind, the darkest things that come to the surface. They are things that gnaw at us, our dearest regrets. But we all have a side we hide, a side we are ashamed of.

So he climbed into the backseat with that 14 year old girl in the woods and he raped her. He robbed her of her innocence, he watched her bleed. He put every piece of himself and his hatred into her and used her as a filter for his mind. But it didn’t work..And even as she lay still and silent with her eyes open only staring up at him, he knew what he’d done would never be right. No matter how many ways he tried to count it or replay it, it could never be right. He was a monster, and she had made him so. His mother. His deepest regret.

But Silent Hill took this from him and gave it a life; no longer to be secluded and remembered in memory. It became the walls around him, the life he thought he knew. The life he tried to forget.

–

Richard got up off the street now. He shook his head and ash fell from his hair. In search of a destination, a way out, his blue eyes scanned the area. 

There were cars, covered in ash and abandoned. Houses were quiet and empty, silent witnesses to the phantom town he was in. There were no lights on and he couldn’t see the sky. It was only white, pale and empty but dark and soulless, much like him. Taking steps forward, Richard walked down a block where there was a grocery store and a red symbol on the glass. He felt like he’d seen that symbol before but couldn’t remember where. So, without even thinking about it, he pressed his hand to the symbol and it illuminated.

–

“A young 14 year old girl, Elizabeth Stewart was found dead and gagged in a field today. Police say she’d been laying dead for 12 hours until a young woman with her child passed by. The young child had dropped a toy beside the road directly by the field and had seen the body laying face down. He then rushed to his mother who further examined what her son had seen and had discovered Elizabeth’s body. The Chief of Police is all over the case and has still not found the killer.” the news reporter said with fake white teeth.

And then the screen flickered to an ancient man, with a white beard, dark beady eyes and a white complexion.

“We’re doing all we can to find the sick individual who did this.” he said with a voice that seemed weathered from years of seeing the worst of humanity.

Richard remembered turning off the t.v. and walking to the bathroom. No, his past would not escape him this time. Her hands in his pants, his tears running down his face.

He was only 8 years old. He barely knew anything about the world. He trusted her and she took that from him, took the only innocence he had, the only trust he placed in anyone. She did it often, often every week, often saying his name over and over again as she did. But, he would try to get out of her grasp, he’d try to leave her bed and run to his room but she was drunk and she was strong and he couldn’t get away.

When she was done, and he was no longer useful to her, she’d let him go and she’d sigh in her bed as she laughed. She wasn’t right, she was sick in the head and nothing would ever make her well again.

–

Richard came back to reality and fell back on the pavement.

“Wh..wh…why…why ARE YOU MAKING ME REMEMBER THIS?! WHO ARE YOU!?” he said stammered out, shaking in anger and fear as he stumbled back, holding his hand as if it’d been seared.

–

“I am who you were, I am who you betrayed, the merciless liar, the dramatic symptom." the little boy spoke to him in the reflection of the glass in front of the grocery store. 

"Who are you?!” he screamed again at a shadow.

“I am who we all are when we die and who we become when we lie." spoke the young child.

Richard quickly got up in anger, grabbed a nearby brick and tossed it at the window. And then he fell to his knees and sobbed.

"I didn’t do it, it wasn’t me, I swear I didn’t…oh god, I’m so sorry… I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to, I didn’t even know her…Oh god…” 

After ten minutes or so, he got up and walked inside the grocery store and stood just beside the glass. There was nothing in the glass now, only a reflection of the ceiling in shards on the floor. 

In the reflection, Richard could see red words sprawled out.

He looked up hesitantly, willing his trembling fingers to still.

“We are all Liars.We are all Sinners. Go to the gate where the demon swallows hate and sinners.”

There was a map on the the bulletin board beside the grocery store door. Richard walked over to it and saw 2 red circles around 2 places on the map.

“Alchemilla Hospital” and “Staton HighSchool”.

“That’s where I have to go…” he whispered to himself as he yanked the map down, stuffing it in his jacket pocket.

He walked out of the grocery store, half sane and determined as he started toward the hospital first.

–

The streets were as empty as before and with them followed a dark silence; as if they knew something that Richard didn’t. His hands were strangely cold so he stuck them in the deep pockets of his black leather jacket. It was strange, the feeling the town gave him and how they stirred up every edge of his dark past, the one he tried so valiantly to forget.

It seemed that no matter how far he ran or for how long, he didn’t get anywhere and all it did was give him more time to think, about his demons, about things that shouldn’t ever have been.

The fog over the town seemed amplified with each step he took, as if inviting him to an open door, one he couldn’t see. Richard didn’t know where he’d really end up or if his life would ever even eventually mean something. He only knew the task at hand and so it was, at a quick pace, he rushed over to the dark hospital, trying to find a trace of a past that had haunted him all his years. Solemnly he got to the gate with the rusted metal sign that read “Alchemilla Hospital” in dark red handwritten letters. It was falling down, wearing away at the edges and the gate squealed as he pushed it open. There was a car inside the lot, a Pale Blue Volvo, seeming as if it’d been there for years, unmoved and unused. The windows were too fogged up so Richard couldn’t see if there was anything inside. But, on the back of the car, he did see a note, and on the note was scrawled blood red sentences that read, “ Hate is the question. Hate turns love to Ash. Pain is mechanical, needed to heal. Pain and Hatred walk hand in hand. Pain becomes rage.”

He didn’t know what it meant, but he stuck the letter in his pocket neatly folded up and walked steadily to the white doors leading to the inside of the hospital.

**Author's Note:**

> If there is enough call and want for it, I will write a sequel to this and have it up within a week. I'm really hoping for people to love Silent Hill and it's various aspects as much as I do. There is so much symbolism in it and I enjoyed writing this despite the many difficult topics discussed within it. Silent Hill is a place of reckoning. It is a Hell on earth that somehow exists between this plane and others, calling for judgement on all of our "sins" and the horrible things we've done. There are monsters out there and Silent Hill brings that to the forefront. Please leave comments and feel free to ask questions. I'd love the support!


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